To Drink Like Men...In A Gay bar.

My friend Joe Mauricio (not his real name) and I went out last night to an Irish pub--in Chelsea. Which meant--you got it--place was filled with tall lads in soccer jerseys sporting a lisp. And boyfriends. Then again, Joe and I were there--which says, what? Say what?

Anyway, jealous as I am to admit it--Joe (again, not his real name) is a class A funnyman. He's an actor, working comedian and one of my dearest friends. So, over the course of a Guinness (whiskey for Joe, he said he's "on a diet") we talked about what it means to be living, scrapping and keeping our heads above water in NYC.

As we compared notes, one thing became clear. Its kind of tough doing the "right action, compassionate thing" in a city where people are elbowing each other on the subway. Turns out Joe (okay, okay his real name) and I are right there, pushing and shoving with the best of 'em. But aren't we supposed to be versed enough in knowing our minds to not believe the hype and get sucked in?

Maybe. Maybe not. So what's my point? I don't have one, I'm hoping like the next subway if I hang around one will show up. My non-point is maybe this city is just too hectic and no matter how much mediation you do, its not enough to keep from barely not elbowing that guy who just dug his in to your rib cage.

Or, and this is the embarrassing admission section--maybe I'm just not working hard enough at my own practice and using the energy of the city as an excuse to foster my own pent up frustration. Bit of an urban-spiritual chicken or the egg deal, in a way.

As I see it, my choices are: a. Don't hang out with Joe. He's clearly the Devil. b. Don't ride the subway. Its clearly the preferred mode of transportation for...the Devil. c. Put my money where my Guinness is and don't elbow back. Cuz elbows are...damn, the Devil thing doesn't work with elbows.

So, since Joe's the only friend I have and I can't afford taxi's, looks like I'm going to have to put on my big-boy pants and actually walk the walk I keep yapping about at those fancy classes I teach on Buddhism. So there it is. I have to stop looking for reasons to throw elbows and start making room for people, in my mind and heart. Either way, looks like its going to be a long trip.

Would've been so much easier if Joe were the Devil. There's nothing like a warm excuse to curl up with and ignore everything around you.